Drowsy

So, yesterday was a pretty anxious/ stressful day.

First, I only had one prescription ready for me at the pharmacy, when there should have been three.

Second, my doctor didn't call in the refill for the one medication that I actually needed.

Third, I was going to be out of gabapentin for the whole weekend! Which is the worst in the world!

I've been on all of my medication for roughly over a year. My gabapentin though has been there from the beginning. Before my diagnosis, I was put on gabapentin to help, and it has. The only problem is that my body is used to it and dependent on it. The last time that I ran out of my gabapentin, the pharmacy was closed (because they're closed on Sundays) and I forgot that the following Monday was a "holiday", which left me without. That day was horrible!

I never knew how horrible withdrawal could be until I experienced it myself. Sure, I saw how horrible it was in movies and had read about it in school. But it's entirely different to actually experience it. I had trouble sleeping, I itched all over, and I kept having hot flashes/chills.

Yesterday, I was terrified that I was going to go through withdrawal again. So, I was a bit of a nervous wreck. I cried for a little bit, tried to shake off my anxiety, and attempted to do a little bit of writing. Of course, nothing really helped. I was too anxious and it didn't help that my doctor office didn't return my call and I was afraid that my pharmacist was getting annoyed with me calling and checking to see if my doctor had called in my refill. Then, it didn't help that I was upset because how could they call in a new prescription and not call in my refills?

So, I decided to not take my routine night time dose, in hopes of having it if I started going through withdrawals. Then, before bed, I took the new medication to help me sleep, like the doctor had told me it would do. Last night, I slept the best that I had in awhile. Of course, in the morning, I was afraid that my prescription still wouldn't be in, which it wasn't

Thankfully though, my pharmacist was able to loan me enough pills to get through the weekend. I have never been so thankful in my life. It was like a gift from the gods and I cried a little bit in gratitude. So, even though I went through a little withdrawal last night, it wasn't as bad as what this weekend could have been like.

Now, I have to figure out if the drowsiness that I'm feeling right now is because of the new medication or because I took the new medication without taking my regular dose of gabapentin. Then, I'll have to figure out if I want to continue taking the medication because even though I slept better than I have in years, I don't want to feel drowsy for the next day.